Sunday, November 30, 2008

Wooo! Girls and Soul Suckers

The universe sent me a message today. In the spirit of High Fidelity, I have been checking in with various ex-boyfriends. Success has been highly variable... from being told to go f- myself (metaphorically) to extended conversations about the meaning of it all. All responses were completely healing. For example, my records indicate my last communication with the one who's still mad was August '07. What kind of a person holds a grudge that long? I had no idea I meant so much to these people who dumped me.

Today, by complete co-incidence, I had lunch with a guy I dated briefly early in 2007 and his new girlfriend. She's also oddly similar to the "new" girlfriend I met of the guy who's still mad (though smart, pretty and with better social skills). I believe this means that universe is telling me that my High-Fidelity project is on-track.

You probably already know that I love How I Met Your Mother (and not just because they named one of the characters after me). The Wooo! Girls episode resonated: I plead guilty! (on all charges.) I mean, I don't think Wooo! Girls are sad, but I do think that they would give all that up in something like a second if the right guy presented the right proposal. Being single is completely wonderful; dating sucks (Thanks, Brian). I believe that every human deeply wants a loving partnership with the right person -- we just confront a lot of obstacles in ourselves and the world to setting all that up.

One of those obstacles is the "soul sucker." The little brother of my best friend since kindergarten, Laura, who I spent Thanksgiving with, shared this concept with me onThursday. He explained: "You're doing great, working hard. You have good friends. Maybe you have some art projects going. Then, you meet someone. Next thing you know, the only thing you're doing is spending time with that person." They're effectively preventing you from living up to your full potential. Thy must avoid the Soul Sucker. ...which basically means that you can only date people who you have a whole lot in common with already. Maybe everyone else already knows that, but it seems like a big constraint to me. It's a good thing I'm done dating.

PS, I can't wait to tell you about the apocalyptic puppet show I saw tonight, but it will have to wait for another post.

Friday, November 28, 2008

mission rain... again still

These two were riding on a rainy day in the Mission. I was impressed with her skirt mostly.

They clearly know one of the great secrets to getting around SF -- every bus stop has a map of the entire city!


Only after they rode away did I notice his cool arty hoodie.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Thanksgiving

My blog archives reveal that I do a Thanksgiving post about every 2 years. I don't know what that means, but here I am in another even-numbered year, posting about Thankfulness.

Back before my family disperated, we used to always "say thankful" before eating Thanksgiving dinner. I find this deeply moving and have been known to break into tears when giving my own thankful at the table. (But then, when have I ever not broken into tears? I'm a passionate person.)

Blogging about thankfulness gets a little redundant over the years. I've been blogging for 4.5 years, and I think I've already given thanks for everything.

I'm thankful for:
  • the health and happiness of my family and friends
  • the ongoing support and love of my family and friends
  • being employable; that someone is willing to pay me to do work I love
  • the technology of the bicycle
  • how beautiful and interesting San Francisco is; how I never tire of it
  • creativity in myself and those near me
  • idealism in myself and those I have surrounded myself with
  • the strength to do the right thing even when it's painful
  • that leggings are back in style because they make biking in a dress easier
  • my health, my body's ability to heal itself, my mind, and that people sometimes don't mind looking at me
  • communications technology such as mobile phones, email and blogs
  • regime change

I remembered today how one year when Grayson and I were living together, he didn't open his birthday presents on his birthday (which was yesterday). After about a week, I decided that his birthday presents had now become Christmas presents because he clearly wasn't excited enough about them. Maybe if he had to wait another month he would become curious. But I was deflated. Back then, I always needed something to look forward to, something to plan. Maybe I was under-stimulated at work. I no longer have those ants under my skin. I'm thankful for that.

Bernal Hill is calling to me to walk on it before "dinner" at 3. I'll do a follow up post if I think of anything else.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

caltrain vogue again

Riding the train most days, I don't always have energy to track down my fashionable companions. This woman impressed me with her hat, stripes and boots. But why did she remind me of Flashdance? (I wonder if she gets that all the time.)

Monday, November 24, 2008

white/skate board art

I was on my way to my friend Fernando's art show at Mission Skateboards, 3045 24th Street (at Treat, show on until Dec. 8), when I saw this dashing young lady. I loved her white bike and helmet teamed with blue skirt and gray tights.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Forest and Sky, my nephews

My sister and her husband celebrated their 10th wedding anniversary today with a vow reconfirmation which brought everyone to tears. (Feeling particularly uninspired, I wore my same burning man outfit from the night before (sans wig) in hopes it would delight my nephews.) Here I am with Forest:

We have a close family friend, Wendy. When she first walked up to Sky today, she introduced herself (not having seen him in a while). She said, "Hello. I'm Wendy, and I can fly," referencing Peter Pan of course.

Sky replied: "So, do it."
Now I think he's my soul twin.

Love Barf

I just returned from a burning man party, and while I really should go to bed, I feel compelled to share instead. I'm also eating leftover risotto from my breakfast (that's what I felt like eating!) and drinking a glass of red wine (I know you're shocked.).

Marie Lyse wasn't familiar with burning man before the party. She said everything was very in the style of "gitane". I said, "You mean like the cigarette?" I came home and looked it up -- it means female gypsy. I guess that makes sense.

We were dancing to the backdrop of a slideshow. Words came up on the screen, and KT whispered to me that she had thought they said "Love Barf" which we both thought was hilarious and appropriate.

Last night, I was out with Marie Lyse too. At the end of the night, her bike was stolen. The time we went out before that, she got a ticket for running a red light on her bike on her way home. I think I give her bad bike karma.

I also noticed that a lot of people I know have a full time job and an extra job... myself included... at least! Along those lines, I am delighted to report that this month at the gallery has turned out ok despite gloomy economic conditions. I keep showing as long as I break even. If I lost money for a year, I would probably stop doing it. But that bridge is nowhere in sight.

Tomorrow, my sister Taylor is having her vow renewal with her husband around their 10-year anniversary. (Laura and Charlie have also been together around 10 years -- was it something in the stars?) A friend asked that we all bring our "blessings" for the ceremony. I don't really know what "blessings" are; so, I did an internet search for them. Here are a few lines I liked:

May love and laughter light your days,
and warm your heart and home.
May good and faithful friends be yours,
wherever you roam.
May rain fall gently on your garden.
May you see your children's children.
May you hold on to what is good even if it is a handful of earth.

I might also use the quote from the previous post.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

shorts overalls etc.

This woman looked great in her shorts overalls and bright red bicycle.

(Yeah, we also like her friend's t-shirt.)

Friday, November 21, 2008

The Final Cupcake (tdc part 5)

We can't wait for next year.

Here, a gentleman with prayer flags on his bike finished the ride.


The afterparty: bike parking anyone?


We ran into this woman as we left the event. She rides a bike and works at Citizen Cake but hadn't heard about the event. We were impressed that she was transporting 2 small dogs (one shown).

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Stops 2 and 3 (tdc part 4)

I have a couple more cupcake posts in me; so, brace yourself!

When we last saw our heroes, they had decided to head up the hill in hopes of finding a station with MORE cupcakes since the last cupcake station had run out. We got a little lost, but after carrying our bikes up a flight of stairs, we found the cupcake station with the highest altitude. While this photo contains many from our team, I was also taken with the orange skirt on your left sported by a lady I do not know.


Here's KT looking oh-so-fashionable with Becca who is just simply adorable even without full vogue. We decided to go OVER the hill instead of around it like we would normally do.


Danielle crests the hill en vogue with Becca just behind....


Our next stop was on the Panhandle where we had some of the best event-sponsored cupcakes of the day. I think KT already posted photos of these two, but here's my record.

Suited man navigates


Girl in black wearing shoes that match her Bianchi


At the stations, they required proof of the number of cupcakes you had eaten either in the form of the wrapper or your solemn oath (when there was no wrapper).

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

She's pretty.

Is it wrong to post a photo of a pretty girl on a bicycle just because I like how she looks? This one's wearing jeans and a t-shirt; so, I think I was taken with her scarf and trendy glasses. She's also riding in the rain.

Monday, November 17, 2008

love is patient...

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves."
1 Corinthians 13:4-7

I find this quote profoundly inspiring and completely impossible. Not envy or boast? Not easily angered? No record of wrongs? what am I a rock? I am certainly no island.

But this quote is running through my mind today because of something my friend said last night about being patient with love. I wonder if I have one patient bone. I mean, in Om Shanti Om on Saturday night, the guy was reincarnated to avenge his love's death, but he still never got the girl. (It was pretty much the greatest silly fun ever, esp when he dances with the water falling on him.) Maybe it just doesn't happen for some people. I think carrying love across lifetimes counts as patient. Of course, as KT said when I referenced High Fidelity the other day: "That's just someone's story." It isn't (necessarily) my story.

My boss said that today's theme was "your job"... that is, what is your job, and what isn't your job. I should not be doing finance's job (despite their efforts). I am the one who has to tell his boss when someone who doesn't report to him made the wrong call about the direction of a project (that can continue to be directed).

Just thinking this through now (when am I not? I'm impatient, remember?) maybe my job in this incarnation has something to do with being patient with love. The weakness in that theory is I believe that I am the way I am because of things that have happened to me in this lifetime. But who knows?

I'm going to stop typing now and continue to repeat that quote to myself on my own.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Rainy Day Chic

I'm sure this post is the beginning of many documenting how the San Francisco cyclists handle our sometimes-wet winters. Maybe that's unfortunate, or maybe it provides a new angle on this, our art form, both in how we adapt to the weather and how we document those adaptations.

This woman appears unphased, if a bit unpleased, in sports coat, scarf, skirt, leggings or pants, and what looks like leg warmers or knee highs as she rides along milk crate on the back of her bike.

Friday, November 14, 2008

crying

How Crying Can Make You Healthier
By Roger Dobson, The Independent UK. Posted November 14, 2008.

Bike to Work


We've been biking to work with increasing frequency and increasing numbers of people. (Truthfully, Danielle and I went just us 2 last week.) This Wednesday was by far our largest party from San Francisco to Sunnyvale/Santa Clara/north San Jose. Right at the beginning of our ride, Allan ate pavement (as you can see). I emailed the group when I got to my desk to see if anyone was up for a lunch ride (I was kidding... mostly). It does make me dinggy for the rest of the day/week tho -- a good reason to try to schedule the rides on Thursdays.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Lingering election thoughts

On election night, Marie Lyse and I rode our bikes past City Hall in hopes of finding a party. We found one guy, riding his bike around too, who said "Gosh, I thought this place would be a mad house." The 3 of us were surprised.

On the other hand, Danielle said that Union Square had "action", and that's a major civic destination from a planning perspective. As I already mentioned, we found significant happenings in the Mission. In this article, John King makes observations about what these neighborhood revelries mean about the way we live in our City. The observations of my community do not support his thesis, but he furthers one of San Francisco's stereotypes -- that it's a city that's really just a bunch of small towns near each other.

At my gallery party last Friday night, everyone was talking about the election. I made the comment that it was "mostly good, except for that one small thing." A fellow artist didn't find my irony amusing. "It didn't feel like a small thing to me," she replied.
Repeal Prop 8

Monday, November 10, 2008

What to do when you are sad

Years ago, my sister sent me some of her ideas for how to make yourself ready for love. The only one I remembered was "take a bath with candle light and herbs". While no one should ever listen to my advice on anything, my rule has been to try to be the kind of person I would fall in love with. That's why I do everything I do: work, sleep, bath, make art, have friends, cook, house keep, volunteer, exercise, try to keep thin, tend to my body, be nice to my mother... I could go on. The project has grown greater than its purpose, and I have come to like it for its own sake.

But I still struggle with happiness. I've researched it for years. I'm a bit too sensitive; if my boss looks at me sideways, I get in a bad mood. And I care less what he thinks than my friends and family I've known so much longer. He's onto me and keeps his direction gentle. But I still need an occasional boost because someone didn't reach out when they were supposed to or maybe subtly pointed out that I could live up to more of my potential. (I'm exhausted! I can't do any more.)

In my research on happiness, I found that what makes you happy is likely to be the same thing that makes other people happy. So, I have a list of things I do towards that end:
take a bath (if I'm dirty)
get a good night's sleep (if I'm underslept)
drink too much*
go out among people
talk to my friends (trying not to burden them)
watch movies and, more so, TV*
exercise outside
meet new people
sail
go to beautiful places, including tops of hills
take care of myself and my home
finish things, blog posts are easy and immediate for example
sign up for new projects like volunteer work and art activities
work
work on something else
eat baked goods
leave my apartment (or desk)
reach out to people
plan things that are likely to actually happen
have a back-up plan
re-frame the issue so that I can see that my happiness is possible
introspect**
have a coffee*

*not actually recommended
**as if I have another option!

Other ideas?

Saturday, November 08, 2008

19th and Valencia on Election Night


This was happening all over the city! KT said there were fire spinners at 16th and Guererro.

Thursday, November 06, 2008

...and we're off! (tdc part 3)

After much anticipation, the ride got underway. These cyclists, including one with brown leggings and mini, headed off to eat cupcakes... I mean, to win the race.

Our first stop was overwhelmed. As a testament to the event's success, they ran out of cupcakes during our stop there. Here, orange and pink race to enjoy.

Again, our brown mini has her eyes on the prize...

My dear friend Danielle did the ride in boots, skirt and cute green sweater.

Our crew decided to head up the hill to a more secluded stop in hopes of avoiding cupcake shortages.

Wednesday, November 05, 2008

Encore de cupcake (tdc part 2)

The Tour de Cupcake was pretty much the greatest thing that ever happened to anyone. Biking brings out the kid in everyone, but with the addition of cupcakes, you do take the risk of it all just being too much. Here are some kids ready for the ride:

The Bike Kitchen expected about 100 riders. Instead more than 400 showed up. The line was around the block. The wait provided me the opportunity to capture perfectly San Francisco outfits like this yellow mini with arm warmers.

Here's KT in full awesomeness with stylish hat, poncho and her usual vintage town bike with our friend Jeff:

This woman did the ride in heels, knickers and lovely green jacket and purse.
Finally, a few riders were in costume. I walked up to this guy and said "you dressed that way because you didn't want anyone to notice you, right?" He agreed by posing for me. His friend in pink is also fabulous.

I have enough photos for at least one more post. So, sit tight.

Cautiously Optimistic

Last night was crazy. We tried to go to a party at the Yerba Buena center for the arts but it was over capacity and not everyone in our party got in... including me and Marie Lyse. So, we mosied to a nearby sports bar with lots of televisions and had to wrestle for tables, chairs and physical space (we never got more than one chair for our party). We ordered chicken wings, jalapeno poppers, nachos (etc...Danielle said they were the worst nachos she had ever had) but at least our food was thematically appropriate.

The large, noisy bar went quiet when McCain gave his concession speech at 8 on the dot. That was one outstanding speech! I read about his love for chaos as indicated by his selection of Palin as running mate (and many other decisions), and I can't help but point out that he would have received more votes without her. Likewise, Obama would have received more votes if he were white. We are what we are. Obama won!

I cried when Obama spoke. I worried if he was safe. I hugged perfect strangers in elation. This presidential election is such good news, I'm bracing myself for disappointment. Who knew it was possible we could have a black president? The camera hovered on Jessie Jackson's tearful face.

If I had been able to vote in the primaries, I probably would have voted for Hillary. I don't like Palin. However, I am also aware that twice this country has chosen a black man over a woman in this election. We are less racist than we are still sexist. I don't confront sexism much in my every day life, but I believe Geraldine Ferraro when she says it is still absolutely a man's world (according to Danielle).

Obama, Biden and their families spent a long time on the stage in Chicago. I had lots of time to analyze their expressions. Barack and Jill Biden both looked nervous but happy. Michelle and Joe looked thrilled. If I fell in love with a man who wanted to run for president, I would rise to the occasion, but it wouldn't be my first choice. Danielle suggested that Obama was tempering his joy to express instead his seriousness about the job, and I can appreciate that.

People were dancing and singing in the streets. The intersection of 19th and Valencia was completely blocked with celebration. (I took a video with my little camera which I might post later.) It was a special night to be in San Francisco!

Saturday, November 01, 2008

Valencia Corridor

I don't know what this woman is wearing. Stockings and nothing else? Hey, I like it. It just confuses me.


This one I liked because she wears boots with a normal biking outfit. I recently had a massage therapist who was a cyclist, and she commented on the impact cycling has on our ankles. Boots seem counter-intuitive for this reason. I always love it when folks wear them anyway.