Stories and categories

Another overcast day in Paris, and I’m pondering how you never know where the gifts of your life will come from: love, money, music, joy, satisfaction…. I’ve wanted the complete Beatles on my computer forever, and I had this idea for unknown reasons they would come from DJ… which was strange since we have never shared music. Whenever left alone in a person’s apartment with my computer, I scour their collection for something I might like. Here, in J&G’s, waiting for the sun to come out or inspiration to strike, I find they have a complete Beatles anthology. (At home, I only have it in vinyl, and since I no longer have a record player, that doesn’t do me much good anymore).

I find it useful to avoid getting attached to any one storyline like where my Beatles will come from or who will refer me to a job when I need one. Stories are better when they unfold exactly not as you suspect. So, you try to make decisions for reasons, listen to your gut, and keep your options open… until you stop and commit to something. Then, you must have complete faith in that thing or you’re setting yourself up for misery.

My mother said when her first two marriages broke up, she was so heartbroken it never occurred to her that her divorce affected anyone else. Each marriage lasted less than 2 years and yielded a child. In French, one word, fierté, is for the pride you have in your country or your children, and another word, orgueil, is for the deadly sin. We use language to categorize things and understand them, but we also find that these same words and categories make them more difficult to understand.

I’m back in Paris after a week in Brittany with my mother. I can’t recommend Brittany enough. I’m also happy to be on my own again. Tomorrow morning at the crack of dawn, I head off to Zurich for the weekend and Sultan’s wedding. I’ve lots more to share but no muse and a day ahead of me to see again this whole city. Sometimes I feel like my waking activities are primarily for the purpose of creating a situation where I will be able to sleep that night.