email excerpt on Relationships

...I agree that it's more about the feelings than the action. But I also think that in a LTR, it's normal to get excited about other people. It doesn't mean you want to sleep with them (but sometimes it does and that doesn't mean you are going to) and it certainly doesn't mean that you are any less committed to the Relationship that you're in. I say this because I am sure it will come up for you again, and I hope you will handle it better next time. Life is long and contains a lot of interesting people, but that shouldn't prevent true love from surviving.

Do you watch Grey's Anatomy? I love it. In case you don't know it: George and Meredith and roomates, and they also work together at the hospital. Meredith gets a dog which George hates. George says, "you have to choose between me and the dog" and Meredith chooses the dog. On the advice of an older woman in the hospital, George stands up to her and says "You are not allowed to choose a dog over me." And the whole thing ends happily. They give the dog to Meredith's married ex-boyfriend bc he owes her big time.

Of course, it's not that simple in Relationships and in reality bc of hurt feelings and all that. Sometimes people don't belong together and the "other people" are just a mechanism to get out of a situation that doesn't work. But, sometimes you do belong together, and those are the times it's important to stand up and tell them they aren't allowed to choose the dog.